Sunday, May 5, 2013

SEX & Our first OB/GYN visit

Well, I bet that grabbed your attention. There are a few reasons I bring up this topic.

For one, C and I have decided that we will both be finding out the sex of our baby. I felt terrible for speaking up but I couldn't help it. I explained to C that I feel like I need to know for our first baby. Because I want to be able to plan and I want the baby shower to be gender themed etc. I did promise her that when we have our second we will make that baby a surprise. I also explained that no matter what the birth will be special even if we do know the gender of our baby. I feel like I kind of let C down, but I know deep down she will be so happy that we found out.

So, now I am trying to think of cool ways to find out. We don't want to find out on our US, we want the tech to write it down on an envelope and then do something with it. That being said I don't want to do a gender reveal party because I feel like I can't ask for that and a baby shower and I don't want to wait too long before knowing lol. Plus I want people to know before the shower. C mentioned maybe taking the envelope to Lowe's and handing it to the guy in the paint department. We would explain that we wanted a certain color for a girl and a certain color for a boy. And then after it was done we would take it home to the nursery and open it together. I like that idea actually. Any other ideas?

Also, I have compromised with C about not having the expensive Martenit21 test and waiting until our gender reveal US which feels like FOREVER away! About 9 more weeks. I suppose patience is a virtue :)!

Off to another topic of sex.... C and I have been lacking in that department. And it is all because of me, I know this. My poor poor wife. I am just never in the mood anymore. And it feels different (physically that is). C even said my cervix feels lower. I don't know but I need to make more of an effort because I do miss it lol. I never thought sex or rather lack of sex would be an issue during pregnancy. Hopefully my second trimester will magically fix this lol.

ANYWAY, we had our first OB/GYN appointment and I must say I was not at all happy with it. It feels so far from what I expected. The nurse doing the intake seemed annoyed that she was working. She started asking me all of these health questions and I had to stop her and remind her of how we conceived.  Most of the genetic questions needed to be directed towards C and they weren't. Frustrating to say the least. Then she says that we will basically have two US's the whole pregnancy. Which shocked the shit out of me because C and I have been getting weekly US's at our RE's office. I guess we are SUPER spoiled. Then we found at that it basically didn't matter who we picked for our OB because it sounds like we will never see him since the practice is so big. UGH we are just going to go with the flow but I am already feeling like we should have went elsewhere. Maybe next pregnancy we can explore home birth and midwives.

Well until next time, baby dust to all!


  1. oh girl! I feel ya in the intimacy department..or lack there of. lol We haven't done it since before the egg retrieval...she wasn't in the mood beause her ovaries were the size of grapefruits and then after the transfer she was ready to go and the doc said no sex til the first us!!! so yeah we are hurting. And as far as ultrasounds go, you guys are SPOILED! We only get one at the fertility office and then get the boot to the ob and don't get another til 9 weeks!!! I do llike the paint idea! make sure you tell them not to put a swab of the color on the outside though out of habit!!

  2. I haven't actually heard of anybody else getting weekly ultrasounds, so you've definitely been spoiled! We're 13 weeks now and have had 4...

    It's funny how different people feel about finding out the sex. Sea and I have decided we will, but we're not going to share the information with anybody else: particularly because we don't want them to know at a baby shower!

    The paint idea is cute!

  3. Okay I am SOOOOO glad I am not the only one with the lack of wanting sex! After going through the 2.5 years of fertility treatments and the two IVF's I was as scared as could be to have sex. I have this crazy thing in my head that something will happen the moment we do it. I feel so bad for Sarah but she has been such a trooper. I also have been not in the mood LOL!

    I love the paint idea....and guess what those 9 weeks will go by SUPER fast!! I can't believe we are at 22 weeks!

  4. I Love that paint idea - how ingenious and cute! I would go with that, do you think Lowe's would go for that? I dont see why they wouldnt.

    I totally agree with the intimacy issue, Andrea and I have been having the same problem. Its a combination of her being so sick/tired and honestly, yes by fear hurting the baby. I know that is so silly and illogical but I cant get it out of my head!

  5. You are not alone in the sex idea. I will say, I wasn't in the mood when I was pregnant, but I also was afraid of "breaking the baby" literally! So, don't fret, it will come back, but eh - it's no biggie. Anyway, I love the idea of getting the gender written, you could do gender reveal pictures too! So, you could have a photographer capture you both opening the envelope together and then revealing it to the camera. That may be a fun way to announce the gender to both yourselves and the world! :)

  6. It's been 7 months now, and I assume you've given birth already. I wonder if you were serious when you stated that you didn't pick your OB. Can you update me more about this? I didn't have a good first appointment with my OB, but I really looked for a caring one. I never want to risk the life of my precious baby. How are you now? :)

    Georgia Ferguson @ Family Medicine Of SouthBend, P.C

    1. Georgia, what I meant by not being able to pick the OB was that we were required to see all of the doctors in the practice. I would have been okay with this except that there were just too many doctors (12). Which meant I may not have even met my delivering doctor! So my wife and I switched to a mid-wife and we were MUCH happier! I had our daughter on 11/30/13 via c-section (my mid-wife assisted). I am doing great now, still healing but feeling more like myself. And the baby is such a blessing!