Beta #2

Okay so today's beta HCG was, 125. Which is my favorite number :)!


I feel like time is passing so slowly these days! I guess it's my nerves kicking in hoping I make it passed the first 13 weeks without miscarrying. I should probably be more optimistic but I can't help it!

So anyway our first US can't come soon enough, I am so curios to see if it's one or two babies. I am leaning towards one since my beta wasn't sky high, but who knows. Our first US is Thursday, which will just show the gestational sac and how many are in there. I downloaded this pregnancy app on my phone and the baby or babies now went from a poppyseed to an orange seed! So weird lol.

Well, today is a beautiful day where I live so I am going to take our doggie for a long walk on a nearby trail :)

Beta

Well I think we took enough pregnancy tests to know we are in fact, pregnant. I am in disbelief. I feel incredibly blessed that this worked on the first try. And I was warned that once I get pregnant my new worry would be "how to stay pregnant." And that has officially sunk in. Of course it does not help that  I have read all of the horror stories about early misscarrages. Or partial miscarriages of one out of two babies. That is my fear. I will take one or two. I just want a healthy pregnancy. I would have these worries regardless but I think working in the NICU heightens them. I see the worst of the worst. And I hope and pray my baby or babies can hang tight until term.

One thing that is weird to me is that technically I am 4 weeks preggo already lol. Especially doing IVF makes me feel like I cheated, but in reality they count the extra two weeks for everyone. My due date for one baby is December 5, 2013. My due date for two babies is November 12, 2013.

Well to our beta HCG results today, it was 64.8 and since I am 10dp3dt they are happy with that. Our next beta is on Saturday morning. They said they want to make sure it's at least 50% higher by then which should be 97.2, fingers crossed! Our first US will be sometime next week if the beta numbers are doubling appropriately.

BIG THANKS TO "Sea" from the blog "beginningfromthestart" she made the beautiful banner for our blog :)!

How far along? 4 weeks 

How big is baby? Poppyseed 

Total weight gain/loss: None

Maternity Clothes: Not yet

Have you started to show yet? Not yet

Sleep: The tiredness has begun. I wake up at night to pee at least once.

Best moment this week: Seeing the positive pregnancy tests!!

Miss Anything? Soda

Movement: None

Food Cravings: Just food in general, I can't seem to eat enough. 

Anything make you queasy or sick? Nothing specific but I got my first wave of nausea today.

Gender prediction: If twins one of each, if one a boy

Symptoms: Tired some nausea otherwise great!

Major purchases this week? None

Looking forward to: Our next beta Saturday!

BFP :)

Pictures really are worth 1,000 words:

I feel super blessed! Can't wait for our beta on Thursday to see what are numbers look like.

The start of something good!!

So I rarely post twice in one day but this is definitely post worthy....


My crazy self and my wife decided to take yet another HPT. I assumed it was negative and started to walked away when my wife said to me, "Wait I think I see the faintest second line!"

And she was right it's very very very faint but it's definitely a second line! Too faint to even show in a photo lol (you may not be able to tell from the photo below). This could be the start of a BFP! I hope so at least. We are super excited!!! Especially because at 6dp3dt it's still very early!

We will certainly post photos if the line keeps getting darker :)!!

THANKS FOR ALL THE PRAYERS AND FINGERS CROSSED, WE APPRECIATE ALL THE SUPPORT!

6dp3dt

ONLY FOUR MORE DAYS until our beta!!

Antsy does not even begin to describe what we are feeling. Even though we knew if we took a HPT it would be negative, we still did it. Just couldn't help ourselves. So far the results are BFN. Hoping that changes before our beta on Thursday!

Symptoms wise: Crampy every now and then like I am with my period. Last night my whole body was sore like I ran a marathon lol. But otherwise I feel normal.

Fingers crossed! Baby dust to all!

3dp3dt

So I am almost half way through this tww. If our embryos are still alive they should be over 100 cells by now and hatching out and attaching to the uterine wall. 

So onto symptoms - so far not much. Started getting sharp uterine cramps today. Not sure if it is from the meds or something else. C and I have decided when I am going to test. My beta is next Thursday 13 days past ER. We decided to POAS on this Sunday, 6dp3dt. I am not expecting a BFP until at least Tuesday morning though. But hey.... we just can't help it.

I took my last dose of steroids today, woo-hoo they taste terrible! I switch my estrogen patches (two) every other day. I take Prenate DHA daily. I am still taking my daily IM shot of progesterone in my butt.... ouch! 

We got some sad news today. None of our embryos made it to "freeze."

So C and I had the dreaded, "what if" conversation. I feel like in order remain at peace I need to know there is a back up plan either way. Of course I want this to work on the first try. BUT I don't want to be too naive. So we decided that we will do another IVF cycle. That being said we may go elsewhere. And now that we are educated much more on this whole topic we will make sure we do the right thing for us. 

I'll be honest.... first starting this process I assumed since we have no fertility issues pregnancy would be inevitable. I hope I am right but I can't help but think I am way too naive. I also thought that we would definitely have frozen babies to try again if we needed. But i was wrong. Time will tell, in a weeks time we will know if I am pregnant. 


THIS TWW IS DRIVING ME CRAZY! 

PUPO

Well, today was the big day. We transferred two embryos. One was what they called "perfect" and the second one was "great."

Well my nerves have officially sunk in. Even though they told me countless times that  I can pee and they won't fall out... I am having a hard time believing it! Lol this will be the longest wait of my life!

On a side note the other embryos aren't looking so great. Two have stopped growing. And the other two are still growing slowly but have fragmentation :(. We will see if any of the two can freeze on day six.

I am just hopeful that the little embies inside of my uterus stick and grow :)!

Our beta is scheduled for March 28th, which is a day early due to my work schedule. I am not going to lie I plan on POAS before then, probably 6-8dp3dt.

A three day it is...

I had a pad of paper and a pen ready to go for when the embryologist called. I was prepared to write down the details of each embryo once we got the call. B answered the phone and put it on speaker....and when we hung up the phone, I was overcome so overcome with emotions, I began to cry. But not tears of disappointment...no rather a release of stress and anguish leading up to this call.

The embryologist said "out of the 6 embryos that were fertilized"....(she paused and I closed my eyes for what seemed like an eternity)...."all 6 are cleaving, with one at the two cell stage and the other 5 at the four cell stage"

So we discussed that the surgery center staff would call about logistics for tomorrow's 3 day transfer of the two best embryos.

When B hung up the phone she was instantly flooded with thoughts that came running out of her mouth--she was so excited she began rambling--like the positive effects of the steroids she's been on for a few days (intended to lower her bodies ability to fight anything foreign) and she said "baby, this is so exciting, it's really good news!....oh and I think I'm getting a cold too!"

Not interpreting her words the way she intended them, I was in a moment of silence trying to let sink in what was just said to us by the embryologist, I immediately thought the worst and began to cry.

I do believe it was a release of emotions--especially that my estrogen level was 6500 just two days ago and I'm sure is rapidly returning to baseline.

Ahh, the differences between our personalities and our bodies hormone levels. Yet one more example of how I completely agree that this is a roller coaster ride like none I've taken before.

So tomorrow we will transfer the two best embryos to B.  Doing this with the intentions of allowing the remaining four to continue to grow to blast stage so they may be frozen.

Keeping fingers crossed here.
Thanks for listening!

C

Results on in... well so far.

So out of 16 eggs retrieved yesterday, 15 eggs were mature. They did ICSI with all 15 mature eggs. This morning they called me to give me the embryo report. Out of the 15 eggs 6 eggs fertilized successfully. So far they look good. They will call me again tomorrow to give me an update. They said that they should be 2 - 4 cells tomorrow and they should be able to predict whether or not they can do a three or five days transfer. FIngers crossed for a five day transfer!

I'll be very honest, C and I are a little bummed with the results. I think we expected a few more than 6 eggs. I am just hoping that the 6 embryos we have stay strong and grow normally.

On a side note, ANOTHER SIGN CAME MY WAY. My cousin's grandmother saw me this morning (since I am babysitting my cousin's baby). She said to me, "You were in my dream the other night. You know how you were the ID badge that clips on your shirt?" And I replied, "Yes?" Then she said, "Well in my dream you had a really big ID badge across your belly that said OCCUPIED!" :)


Let's hope our embryo's stick to the development chart :)

Handing over the baton :)

So, as you know, C described that she views this whole process as a two person olympic relay. And today she passed the baton! This morning was egg retrieval. Things started off rocky but got better as the process progressed. C is a very hard stick for an IV so it took the bitchy CRNA three tries to get it. C and I both were a little upset that the CRNA was not very nice. But other than that the retrieval went very well, we got a total of 16 eggs. They will do ICSI later today and give us a phone call tomorrow to let us know how fertilization went.

Just for shits and giggles C took a pregnancy test. Since she took her HCG shot the other day, it was positive lol! Officially her only positive pregnancy test ever :)!

Here is a picture and video from this morning :)

C ready to go!

Surrounded by eggs!

So you're probably wondering what the title actually means. Well as you all know I work in a Neonatal ICU, we decorate and go all out for every holiday. EASTER INCLUDED. Every where I look there are eggs! And although these plastic eggs/decorations mean nothing to our IVF journey I can't help but correlate the two. Every time I lay my eyes on eggs I immediate think of egg retrieval!!!

C and I went to see "OZ" in 3D over the weekend and we grabbed snacks for the movie. I got Reese's Peices.... They were the Easter edition, shaped like eggs!!! Okay so I get it, EASTER is around the corner but still lol!

ANYWAY, C took half of the trigger shot last night because her estrogen level was 5,400!!! Considering mine is nearly 3,000 there is a whole lot of estrogen in our house!! Surprisingly I am the mushy one (well not too surprisingly lol). C is a trooper, she has done much better with the injections than I expected! She even gave her last two days of medications herself!! So, the BIG DAY is tomorrow morning at 8:00AM. Excitement doesn't even begin to describe how super excited me are!!! Wish us luck, and stay tuned for an update, post retrieval.

Change is Good

So C and I went to her appointment this morning. The follicles grew a little bit but they want her on two more days of stim in order to get the best response. Which means the earliest that egg retrieval will be is this Friday. Bittersweet because as antsy as we are this actually is much better for my work schedule! She has another appointment tomorrow morning as well, so we shall see.

I feel like I am living in 24-36hr increments lately... waiting for this retrieval to see how we do and how many embryos develop etc!

Olympic Relay vs E2; Who is responsible?

C writing...

Hey guys,

I have not had a chance to write yet and update you all on my perspective of the events.  I know B has been keeping you all up to date as much as possible.

I'm not quite sure if my mood lately is due to the medication and hormone levels or merely the excitement I'm feeling regarding this journey.  For my part, I envision B and I in a two person olympic relay in which I have the first leg and am about to hand the baton over to her to finish.

While I've been going to our RE office every 3 days, it has increased to every other day over the past week as my stim progresses.  This usually involved about 20-25min for blood draw and transvaginal US.

The first US I had was about 6 weeks ago and I remember feeling slightly uncomfortable (as most women do with a new physician for this type of exam).  As the weeks have gone by, and US done so regularly, I'm at the point where I am making jokes and having conversations with the docs & NP's about what the rest of the day entails for each of us.  It's totally coffee talk at this point.

In addition, 3 days ago I was told my E2 level was in the 800's.  I had it drawn yesterday but forgot to ask for the number.  I'll have it checked again tomorrow-- just for shits and giggles, I'm gonna ask what it is.  I had a friend ask me (who is very well aware of the differences between B and my personality) if I noticed that I was emotional or if I've noticed any other mood swings as my E2 level has risen.  After giving it some thought I realized that I am no more emotional now than I usually am (which for you that do not really know me--i'm not that emotional).  What I do happen to notice as a change--is that I am laughing at my own jokes quite a bit more.  In fact, I find myself downright hysterical lately!

I mean, just because B doesn't laugh nearly as much as she should at my jokes---doesn't mean there not hilarious!  Deep down inside, she knows I'm the funny one ;)

Anyway, enough about our personality differences.  What I'm getting at is that I'm not really sure if me finding myself much more hysterical than usual is related to my hormone changes or if it merely me getting excited at our baton hand off.  Regardless of the reason, I know this easter bunny is coming with all the eggs!!  So B is getting ready for my baton handoff and I'm sure she will fill you in on her perspective after our next appointment tomorrow.

"Sexy Uterus"

Here are some photos of C's "sexy uterus," as she likes to call it, as well as her ovaries:

 UTERUS

RIGHT OVARY

LEFT OVARY

As you can see, she is doing well on the stimulation medications. At her appointment yesterday they saw about 18-20 maturing follicles (not all are visible on the US). They kept her on the 2 vials of Menopur and 150 units of Gonal-F for last night. This morning she had another set of blood work/US. All of the follicles this morning measured 12-13mm which is great. Tonight she will take 3 vials of Menopur, 150 units of Gonal-F, and 1 shot of Cetrotide. She will go back in on Monday for blood work and US. The doctor predicted that she will take three more nights' worth of stimulation medication and on day 4 take the HSG shot. They determine this based on the size of her follicles, they retrieve when they're 18-20mm in size. So, as of right now retrieval will be on Thursday March 14, 2013. We are very very excited!

My uterus is still nice and thick and ready to accept embryos :)! I am still taking the daily 10 units of Lupron and changing four patches of estrogen every other day. Sorry no photos of my uterus just yet.... I figure we will be getting plenty in the future :)!

Update/Boudoir Photos

All is going well here... I am up to four patches of estrogen and still taking the daily 10 units of lupron. My doctors appointment went very well yesterday. The doctor repeatedly complemented my uterus lol. He said that it looked perfect for making the babies stick, and that's what I wanted to hear! So basically I am all set and now in whats called a "holding pattern" until C is closer to retrieval.

C had her bloodwork and US this morning. They counted about 18 premature follicles from both ovaries which is very good :). Tonight she had her fourth set of injections. They have her staying with the two vials of Menopur and 150 units of Gonal-F. Her next appointment is Friday.

Lately, all I have on my mind is "baby makin." Literally, I say the strangest things.... meaning to say something else. For instance last night C brought some Oreos to bed for a snack and I said, "Damn, do you have enough Ovaries?" WHAT!? Lol C just busted out laughing and so did I... what was I thinking? Then I had a dream we were at our first ultrasound and saw two sacs... then they moved over and saw three more! I went from super happy to dreadfully scared, in my dream that is. I think I am a wee bit nervous of anymore than two... would you think?

C and I are still super excited and very giddy lately. We were slightly inappropriate today in the doctor's office lol. Her and I joke about who will win at the "egg producing game." Since I got 24 eggs when I donated... I made a bet that she won't beat me. We are super competitive. The prize...... whoever wins gets a good night in bed how ever they want it lol. AGAIN inappropriate but funny. You need humor in this process or you'll lose your mind! Plus we both know it doesn't matter how many she gets, that is not going to change our plans (assuming she gets at least two good blasts).

ALSO, I am happy to report that C caved in and we bought a KING bed!!!! It arrives on Friday, perfect timing.... before my pregnancy :)!!!!



Here are some of the more appropriate images from my Boudoir session:

Sperm is in the building....

Ladies and Gentlemen our sperm has arrived safe and sound.... to our RE office! Woo hoo! I called to confirm that the little guys (or girls lol) got there okay.... they had a long trip from California Cryobank to King of Prussia PA! This made my day, what a relief. I was so nervous that the tank would go bad and we would lose our only vial of sperm!

Anyway... I am still taking the daily 10 units of Lupron and I am up to four patches of estrogen tomorrow! C started stim last night! She was hilarious, she waited for me to get home from work around 9:15pm. And I drew up and gave her the two vials of Menopur and 150 units of Gonal-F. Feels like deja vu for me, except this time I know it's for our baby making journey :)!

C -  "WAIT! Make sure you put time between the actual stick and medication administration, so I know which hurts worse!"

B (Me) - "Haha, okay babe, are you ready?"

C - "Yes. No. WAIT. Okay I am ready, go ahead."

All that nervousness and then she says, "Oh that wasn't bad at all!"

On a side note my poor wife was so sick the past few days. First a sinus infection and then a GI bug eek! I felt so bad for her... but at the same time I was trying to keep my distance because after that infection I had the last thing I wanted was another bug! Lol I was following her around with bleach wipes! That sounds so terrible, but she understood. And now that she is pretty much better she is getting all the cuddles again :).

Approximately 10 more days until C's eggs meet the sperm and hang out in a dish for five days! Lol I am trying to stay exited and optimistic here :)!

How we got here...

OKAY.... So I could not password protect just a post... so I password protected the "Dirty Details" tab and put the "How we got here" post there since it's more of a detailed about us. Just shoot me an email for the password if you would like it :). My email is bnc0725@gmail.com.

Help a sister out!?

Can someone please help me learn how to make a "protected post" on here? I would like to share C's proposal to me and some other more private things about C and I :)!